Much of the pregame time was swallowed up by picture day at the Ravine, and the rest was filled with reaction to the big UFC fight last night.  There was a lot of pre-fight chatter yesterday among the Blue, so I figure they did their part to juice the pay-per-view numbers.  I know nothing about UFC, really, since mixed martial arts isn't really my bag, though I will say octagons are inherently more interesting than squares.  Apparently the whole thing lasted under two minutes.   I don't speak very good Spanish, but I'm pretty sure I witnessed Rafael Furcal reenact the action for Wilson Betemit and Tony Abreu.  A lot of pantomimed punches, a couple elbows, and an emphatic slam to the ground.  Furcal's performance was good enough that I'm willing to say he saved me $60, or whatever it cost to buy the fight.  So I appreciate that. 

No comebacks, either, as the Dodgers fell short in a bid for last minute razzle dazzle in a 4-2 loss to the Chicago Cubs.  The eighth inning saw a substitute-heavy lineup force Cubs starter Carlos Zambrano into a bases loaded spot of trouble.  A spot the Dodgers were hoping pinch-hitter Jeff Kent could convert into a granny, especially with lefty Will Ohman take over for Zambrano.  Deja vu all over again?  No dice.  Kent went down looking and the Dodgers' chances followed in a similar fashion.  Rafael Furcal watched it all from the bench, having been taken out of the lineup at the last minute due to a stiff knee.  He showed up at the Ravine ready to play, but eventually decided it wasn't worth chancing any further irritation.   Furcal's absence not only put a wrench in any potential box score results, but Grady Little's master plan to rule the world (which seems at best like a roundabout manner of achieving global domination, since it mostly involves flip-flopping his 1-2 spots in the lineup based on lefty vs. righty pitching.  But we'll see how it goes).

Why?  Because after seven weeks or so of mixed-but-generally-bad performances by Cubs ace Carlos Zambrano, I stuck him on the bench of my fantasy team this week.  And, obviously sensitive to the fact he's pitching for a spot in my rotation (and a fat new contract, though realtively speaking I imagine that's more of a back burner issue) Zambrano came out chucking Saturday afternoon against the Blue, allowing only two runs over 7 2/3 innings in Chicago's 4-2 win.  Clearly I awoke the sleeping giant.  Lou Piniella ought to send me a muffin basket.  Aside from a little hiccup in the fourth- a pair of singles from Juan Pierre and Tony Abreu opened the inning but no runs were scored- Zambrano was basically untouchable until the seventh, when Wilson Betemit cracked an 0-2 offering over the wall in right for his fifth homer of the year. 

Given what I do for a living, the following revelation will not likely reveal much to most of you:  I suck at math.  Always have, and barring some sort of cranial transplant (can they do that?), always will.  But I'm sharp enough to put the following equation together- 7:40 Friday night start + 3:14 game time + 12:55 Saturday afternoon game = slow clubhouse.  And not just for the players.  I hit the room around 10:00, and thought I might have missed Grady's pregame confab, because only one other writer was in there.  Turns out I was just early.  Everyone started rolling in, and a tired bunch they were.  Brett Tomko was sporting bed head the likes of which I hadn't seen since I quit teaching.  But I knew something was up when I asked Derek Lowe if, with his Pistons up 2-0, he was ready to put them in the Finals. 

"I'm so tired I can even think about it," he said.  Wow.  Considering Lowe would probably talk Pistons at a funeral, that's some serious tired he's fighting. 

The Cubs are a perennially sad bunch in need of help, and on Friday night the Dodgers seemed primed and ready to donate to the cause.  In the seventh, they turned a four run lead into a three run deficit  before cutting off aid to Chicago, coming back in the eighth to take the lead in their 9-8 win.   The last three innings seemed to take place in a parallel universe, with the bullpen in shambles and the offense leading the way.  To say that Joe Beimel, Yhency Brazoban and Jonathan Broxton were ineffective in the seventh frame would be a mild understatement.  The Cubs turned 12 batters, eight hits (most hit between hard and really hard), a walk and an error into seven runs and a cushy 8-5 lead. 

I don't know which sounds more improbable.  The Dodgers' typically trusty pen giving up 7 runs in the seventh inning, shifting a 5-1 Dodger lead into an 8-5 deficit.  Or the often anemic Blue offense immediately responding with four runs in the eighth inning, allowing Takashi Saito to hold serve and preserve a 9-8 win over the Chicago Cubs.  Tie goes to the runner, I guess.  Or in this case, the Dodgers.

After starter Derek Lowe allowed just one run over his six innings of work, the haywire seventh inning saw Joe Beimel, Yhency Brazoban and Jonathon Broxton (tagged with the official "BS") combine to allow 8 hits and 6 earned runs, putting the game seemingly on tilt before Rudy Seanez finally got them out of the inning.  His eighth inning contribution to the box score was also scoreless, which settled things down for the Blue runs coming in the bottom of that same frame.  "It's gonna happen," said Seanez of the pen's roller coaster ride.  "It's not the first time it happens.  It's not going to be the last."   

But just leave it on the doorstep and ring the bell, because he's all covered in flu germs.  Schmidt came down with a bug during the off-day- sweet way to relax, huh?- and was told to stay home during tonight's game, lest the whole team end up feverish and queasy.  What are the repercussions of this sudden illness?  Well, aside from the fact that Schmidt likely feels like absolute crap right now, his simulated game scheduled for today required postponement.  For those of you who laid a little cash in Vegas on the results of Schmidt's imaginary game, I imagine the casino will just refund your original bet or allow you to put it on another simulated game down the road.  Mark Prior has one penciled in for April 2008, if you wanna get on the stick early.

On a related note, BK and I have a buddy named Rob who'd easily bet on a simulated baseball game.  Gladly.  In, like, two seconds.  Hell, he would bet on simulated simulated baseball if a line was made available.  The boy likes him some gambling.

Much is made in the media of the fact the Dodgers have won only one playoff game since the '88 World Series championship.  Well, no amount of futility compares to what Cubs fans have endured since 1908.  So as the Blue open their series tonight against the Baby Bears at the Ravine- sending out Derek Lowe (4-5, 3.84) against lefty Ted Lilly (4-2, 2.69) it's important to remember success, specifically the lack thereof, is very relative.  This season, the Cubs have had little of it on the road so it'll be important for the Dodgers not to do them any favors and allow Chicago's natural, expertly cultivated shaky karma do its job.  Certainly it did in Derrick Lee the last time he visited the Ravine.  And while the players on both teams wait for that to happen, they can discuss what they have in common- a lack of consistent run production. 

Yesterday we asked where the Dodgers would be without Russell Martin, and of course nobody on, connected with or rooting for the Blue wants to find out. So when balls start flying in the general vicinity of his head, as they did in Wednesday's 5-1 win over the Brewers, folks get upset. The trouble came in the fifth, after a Martin home run bid was correctly ruled foul. The next pitch from Milwaukee's Carlos Villanueva flew over Martin's head like a wayward offering from a $.50 batting cage. Villanueva then tossed ball four, sending Martin to first. That's when the yapping started between the Brewers dugout and first base coach Mariano Duncan, then Duncan and Prince Fielder. Benches and bullpens cleared, players generally stood around (this is baseball, after all), then left the field. Much ado about nothing. Of course, the box shows by his point Martin--who beats Brewers starter Chris Capuano like John Bonham did a snare--had already doubled in three, scored a run and almost homered. He'd add a sac fly just for some extra icing on that cake.  Which is why, as we mentioned, nobody wants to learn about life without Russell.

As Dodger fans replay visions of tonight's 5-1 win over the Milwaukee Brewers in their heads, they'll be tempted to sing Russell Martin's praises.  And I understand why, on the surface, the night would appear like primo resume material.

A) Career-high 4 RBIs.

B) Scoring the Dodgers' other run.

C) Nearly knocking in another run on a homer eventually ruled foul- despite a trip around the bases- after an ump conference (Don't see that very often.).

D) Helping keep the peace between first base coach Mariano Duncan and Brewers first base coach Ed Sedar (then Prince Fielder) in a tiff that eventually cleared the benches (but no punches thrown). 

Pretty solid work, for sure.  But let's be honest.  Were this truly a night to declare young Russ having "done it all," the kid would capped things off by also writing this postgame report.  There's a laptop in the Dodger clubhouse.  The Ravine's wireless Internet likely reaches the dugout.  He's got time to kill between innings.  The fact that he didn't take the initiative to recap (thus leaving me to do it) makes this a decidedly "slacker" effort on his part.  Or at the very least, a "B-/C+" game with serious wiggle room for improvement.  Time for someone to decide if he really wants to play professional ball.    

More to come later.  (NOW ADDED, AFTER THE JUMP)

AK