Only a cheap and lazy writer would resort to making old guy jokes on a night like tonight

"They're two men out there competing with everything they have to beat the other team.  I don't think that'll ever change in either one of those guy's lives," Grady Little said of the matchup.  "It may not be what they had 20 years ago, the same stuff, but they'll be competing to try and win the game."   Little, not surprisingly, has been happy with what the Dodgers have received from Wells.  "It's just what we had expected.  He's a guy who will take the ball, compete, and keep you right in the ballgame.  He's done that for us each start he's had." 

And without going out on a limb, I'm willing to bet Wells would like to go out tonight shove this one right up the Padres' posterior.  Aw, hell.  We're talking about David Wells here.  If ever there was a time to say "ass" instead of "posterior," this is it. 

Ass.  There you have it. 

In other news, Andy LaRoche said his back issue is due to a "protruded disc."  He's been on an exercise program to try and strengthen the area, something he'll continue through the offseason.  It's nothing that should require surgery or bother him into spring training next year, assuming LaRoche doesn't slack off.  Ironically, his most recent bout of stiffness came because of an off day.  More specifically, an off day when he got off his program.  He must be getting old.  "Yeah, I'm washed up already," LaRoche joked. 

Derek Lowe was able to play catch today, a very encouraging sign.  "All I was concerned about was that he was able to grip a baseball and throw it, and he was able to do that.  We're more than optimistic that he'll be ready to go on Saturday."  Lowe joked that he ought to wear one of those red jerseys quarterbacks don at practice to make sure nobody accidentally hits him.  Lo and behold, that's exactly what he had during warmups today (provided, perhaps, by Broxton).  He certainly did look protected out there.  No word if the little dose of levity will garner a letter from the rather humorless league office uni police. 

"He may get a letter with one of those pictures in the mail like I got," Little joked, referring to his own brush with the fashion cops who busted him for wearing a short sleeve jacket with no jersey underneath.  It's not that he couldn't wear it, "but at a thousand dollars a pop, I quit doing that.  I guess they had some sort of modern technology to tell there wasn't (a jersey)"  Call it Terry Francona west.  At least they didn't pull Little out of the dugout.  "I'm sure that was a geographic thing.  A lot of people like coming to the west coast, but I don't think they'd come all the way out here for that."

LINEUPS- Not surprisingly, Luis Gonzalez, a .315 career hitter against Maddux, is on the card.  He'll hit in behind Jeff Kent, who has a .321 career mark vs. the future HOFer.  James Loney has been bumped up to third, while Matt Kemp goes down to seventh.  It's a lefty heavy group up top.  Tony Abreu gets another start at third.

DODGERS-

Rafael Furcal- SS
Juan Pierre- CF
James Loney- 1B
Jeff Kent- 2B
Luis Gonzalez- LF
Russell Martin- C
Matt Kemp- RF
Tony Abreu- 3B
David Wells- P

PADRES-

Brian Giles- RF
Marcus Giles- 2B
Mike Cameron- CF
Adrian Gonzalez- 1B
Khalil Greene- SS
Kevin Kouzmanoff- 3B
Scott Hairston- LF
Josh Bard- C
Greg Maddux- P

BK